Eternal Consequences

So this week marks my 5 months of being home from my mission… that means 5 months of not getting weekly LONG letters from me about every detail of missionary work you could ever imagine… I’m sure you are all dying of boredom with all the free time I’m saving you, so I figured I’d share with you a mission miracle, that happened 5 months after the mission ended. That is the wonderful thing I’m finding about my opportunity to serve a mission, it didn’t just bless me for 18 months, it is blessing me DAILY! I thought people were joking when they say not a DAY goes by without thinking about their mission, but I have found its true. I even dream about it and dream about going back. But the hardest thing about coming home from a mission is the lack of purpose, especially on a spiritual level. My whole life I prepared to serve a mission, then it came, and in a blink of an eye 18 months was over and now I’m home…. so now what? Obviously as far as school goes and the general details of my life are concerned, I got a basic plan and LOTS of goals, but as far as Spiritual things go, I feel like I’m lacking goals. That’s rough sometimes. And this last week it was especially rough. However, Friday I got a HUGE tender mercy in the form of a facebook message.

I hope you all remember the story I told at my homecoming about a Guo Jiemei (Sister Guo). I met her on her scooter at a stop light when I was serving in FengYuan. She had the same Chinese last name as me, which I felt was rare, so I go, “Look we are sisters!” and began to testify to her about God and ask her about church. She was golden. But she didn’t live in our area. Just another referral to add to the list. A few weeks later is when a district leader in the other area told me about her baptismal interview and how she had been thinking about going to church but didn’t know why there were so many different churches and didn’t know where to start. She wanted a change, thought that learning more about Christianity would help, but had no idea where to start. There she was pondering this question the VERY moment I pulled up to her on my bike. She thought it was so weird that this white girl had the same last name as her but was touched by what I said. She was so excited she lived close to the church in her area and she met with the missionaries that same week. Now just a few weeks later she was prepared for baptism and had a REAL testimony of the gospel! Her life had already changed. She was originally the biggest tender mercy of my mission, she showed me that the small effort I was making was worthwhile even if I didn’t get to see the effects, good things were happening because of my willingness to serve God. I wrote her after hearing this story and we corresponded a few times until I came home and we became facebook friends, messaging occasionally. I love this woman. I hardly know her because I never got the chance to see her in person for more then that few minutes we talked on that day that we met. However, she touched my life significantly and I am so grateful I got to be a vital part of her conversion process and I LOVE her! The story didn’t end there… it was picked up Friday just at the time I needed it. She messaged me and told me that it was a year ago this month that she was thinking about which church to join and she wanted to thank me for finding her on the road that date and declaring we were sisters and testifying to her about God’s love. She told me she was eternally grateful for that and it has changed her life and the life of her children. She told me she is preparing to go to the temple to take out her Endowments next month and get her patriarchal blessing. She feels that her life has so much hope and great things await her and her family… and she wants to thank ME for helping her get there. Me. A little foreign girl in Taiwan who couldn’t speak perfect Chinese and didn’t always have the perfect attitude or the perfect thing to say…me. Words can’t describe to you how much that little message meant to me. I imagine in the pre-existence I sat next to this woman, she really was my sister then. I bet we knew each other well and I promised to be in the right place at the right time so I could FIND her and help her find the missionaries. I bet God inspired my MTC teacher to pick the Chinese last name Guo for me so that when I met this sister of mine, we’d recognize our special connection from before we came to this earth. I hated that name my whole mission until I met Guo Jiemei. Then I understood why I had it. I hated that area I was in… until now when I understand why I had to be there. I was just fulfilling a promise I made long long long ago. I feel like I truly understand the scripture in D&C 18:15 “And if it so be that you should labor all your days in crying repentance unto this people, and bring save it be ONE soul unto me, how great shall be your joy…” I have felt that way about many of the people I served in Taiwan, but especially with Guo Jiemei as she prepares to make these life changing covenants and endure to the end. I hardly know her, but she considers me a vital part of her conversion as well as a true sister. In my setting apart as a missionary, I was told to recognize that my efforts would have eternal consequences, I feel like this particular woman was exactly what he was talking about and this particular instance was what God wanted me to recognize. If I had served for 18 months and not helped another soul, I know I would still feel like my mission was successful because of this wonderful woman. I know her children and her grandchildren and everyone she comes in contact with will be changed because of her fervent testimony in our Savior Jesus Christ. This week she more than returned the favor to me as she became another tender mercy and filled me once again with hope, the fire of missionary work, and a new spiritual goal: I want EVERYONE I come in contact with to be better off because of MY testimony in Jesus Christ and His restored gospel. I hope she inspires you to recognize and remember the eternal potential of all our interactions with others. I know that God has a perfect plan for each one of us. If we have the desire and are keeping His commandments, He will put us where we need to be so we can help/serve/influence/meet/etc. those people we need to meet.

 Guo Jiemei and sons and husband

Guo Jiemei on her baptism day June 2012

His Grace is Sufficient

I have been meaning to blog this small tender mercy, but I haven’t found the opportunity until now. Getting back to school after the mission has seemed a bit crazy and I feel like my life has lost a lot of purpose, but the Lord has been filling my life with small tender mercies to remind me that even though I’m not a missionary, He is still VERY aware of me. Even if it’s as small as a little voice I hear just as I am about to walk out the door to my 8 am Chinese class that reminds me that my assignment that is due is still in the textbook on my dresser and not in my backpack, or something a bit bigger like helping me get home safely in the blizzard last night.

My second week of school I had a very random tender mercy that reminded me that God knows exactly what we need to hear, when we need to hear it. Every Tuesday we have the BYU devotionals and you can watch them in a few places. One option is live in the Marriott center, one is in the JSB in a movie theater type classroom, and then there are a few more small places around campus that show it (every TV automatically broadcast’s it at 11 on Tuesdays). Because I spend all the time on the opposite end of campus, I don’t always take the time to walk to the devotional at the Marriott. This Tuesday, I did the same and I was thinking about going to the JSB, but I remembered I used to always watch it in the Benson building and it was less crowded and more comfortable. So I went in, sat down, pulled out my lunch, and waited for it to start.

I got so excited when it announced that Brad Wilcox would be speaking.  Mom had told me about a talk he had given while I was on my mission and how he’d written this amazing book. But I’ve only been home a few weeks and have no time to give thought to reading the book for myself. I also never even thought of watching the talk, so I was excited he was speaking at BYU again and hoping he would speak about some of the same things. All these kids and I watched as he gave one of the best talks ever. I was frantically taking notes during it because EVERY line was amazing and profound. I learned new things about the Atonement and felt this talk was geared JUST towards me at this moment. My heart was filled with such gratitude. And then something funny happened, in the talk he said, “And as pioneer day approaches..” And I thought, “I’m pretty sure it’s President’s day that’s next week not pioneer day.” And then the thought hit me, this was a rerun. No one else in the room seemed to think it was strange. I texted Karlie to confirm, and it was true, a rerun. Randomly, someone had chosen to set up the TV in the classroom to not play the live devotional that automatically is played on every computer or TV screen on campus and put on a rerun. I’m still not exactly sure why in this one classroom the rerun was playing, but I’m so grateful that God sent me there so that I could hear what I needed to hear. God new I wouldn’t have the extra time to sit and look up a talk mom had told me about while I was still in the MTC, but He knew I’d take Tuesday at 11:00 and that I’d be in the Benson building. I was grateful that he prepared a way for me to hear the message I needed that week. It was also a reminder that God knew where I would be because He LOVES me. He cared about what I would listen to that day.

To make the story even better, and make me even more appreciative, when I was telling mom and Heatherann about this story, they both were like, “I forgot that you’d never seen it! I thought you were the one that showed it to us!” So if I had not been in that classroom, I would have likely gone a LONG time without ever hearing this message. I know that God really cares about the things that we listen to. He really will give us the revelation and the message we need, if we are in the right place at the right time.

http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=1966&view=2

I also decided to attach the video, just in case anyone hasn’t taken the time to listen to this talk before and I encourage those who have forgotten it’s message or who feel inspired to to watch it again! It’s great!  Christ’s Atonement really is sufficient for us ALL!